>> April 24, 2012
Sometimes, no matter how much you want something... it's just not going to happen. But Wedding Denial (yeah, that's a real thing) is some pretty powerful stuff. Somehow when I think about my wedding there are things I want that I know I can't possibly have but I feel like if I want it bad enough, or wish upon a star or something, everything will all just work out.
I'm not talking about your regular wedding desires that you know you can't have. I accepted the fact that I wasn't going to have the kind of wedding that's a magical waltz through wonderland at every step of the way a long time ago. You've seen the ones... you know, where they hire your favourite band and they play all night long, or they serve a 7 course meal, followed up with a grilled cheese truck and a make your own snow-cone station. Those things are all awesome, but they're just not in my budget so I let them go early.
It's the other stuff, that stuff that might just be possible but somehow isn't. For example, I grappled with the size of our guest list for a long time before I realized that the venue we'd chosen was simply too small and we'd have to invite fewer people. There's other things that I'm still mentally arm-wrestling with, trying to find a solution as if they were just a matter of will power and not total physical impossibilities. Sadly, these mental battles stop me from actually getting things done.
Tonight, I'm working on facing the facts. It might rain, we don't have a back-up, so we'll have to bring umbrellas. The costs of things won't magically drop if I refuse to add them all together. It's time to move on. Have you struggled with Wedding Denial? How did you move past it?
And because things are always better with photos, here's that yummy looking snow-cone station I let go of...